August is Women’s Month in South Africa, when we celebrate the strength of our amazing women. But if you’re a working mother, chances are you don’t celebrate your strength: it’s simply a requirement for you to get through the weeks, months, and years. Between keeping your career afloat, raising children and often being the one who keeps the household running smoothly, working moms are often stretched to the limit. Add in school WhatsApp groups, sick kids, stressful work deadlines and your own ageing parents, and it’s no wonder working mothers are particularly vulnerable to burnout.
But while a solution may feel impossible, just a few small shifts can help you start to prioritise yourself and help reduce the stress of the juggle. Here are six tips to help you navigate being a working mom – and protect your physical and mental wellbeing in the process.
1. Redefine what balance means
We’re often advised to create a better work-life balance, but the practicalities of doing this can often create even more pressure on us. Instead of expecting every day or week to be perfectly balanced between work and home, accept what your week looks like right now. Some months will be more career-focused while others will be more centred around family. Balance isn’t about doing everything equally – it’s about making room for what matters most right now, and letting go of what you’re not able to focus on without guilt. The goal isn’t to be perfect: it’s to be ok with yourself even when things are challenging, while knowing you’re doing your best.
2. Put systems in place
A working mom’s life is inevitably packed with lots of moving parts and small details. One simple way to lessen the overwhelm is to introduce simple daily systems that can help you keep track of what needs to be done when. This could mean a shared family calendar (it may be easier to have a printed rather than digital version), a weekly meal plan, setting up a recurring grocery order through an online store like Checkers Sixty60, or dedicating Sunday afternoons to preparing food for the week ahead.
3. Normalise asking for help
For many moms, the idea of asking for help feels like they’re failing. The truth is that we’re social creatures not designed to exist on an island – in fact, the notion of nuclear families is relatively new compared to past centuries, when extended families typically lived together and shared the load of raising children. In a modern context, relying on your community may involve asking your partner to take on more of the school run, reaching out to grandparents to take the kids for an afternoon on a weekend, or trading playdates with a mom from school. However, to you, building a support structure is key in lifting the load. Plus, the more we normalise asking for help, the more we model healthy behaviour to our children as well.
4. Make your health non-negotiable
As a mom, you’re probably on top of your children’s health, but how’s your own health doing? Whether it’s a GP check-up, a hygienist appointment or getting your annual pap smear, your health matters just as much as your children’s. Prevention is also key to maintaining your health, which is why screenings and check-ups are so important. If you belong to a medical aid, you may have some of these screenings included as part of your benefits. Fedhealth’s screening benefit, for example, covers female beneficiaries between 21 and 65 for one pap smear every three years. Take the time to book that appointment, because prioritising your physical health is one of the best ways to support your family in the long run.
5. Set boundaries around your time
As a working mom, you’re probably pulled in every direction, whether it’s juggling afternoon meetings with after-school pickups or being at weekend hockey or rugby matches when all you want to do is rest. While you may not be able to skip these obligations, you can protect your time more deliberately. Set clear boundaries at work for when you’re available and when you’re not. At home, carve out time in the evening to wind down with your family without phones or tech. And try to set aside an hour or two on weekends that’s time just for you. Boundaries aren’t about keeping others out – they’re about keeping your energy intact so you have more to offer.
6. Reconnect with what makes you happy
When life gets very busy, the things that you once did simply for the joy can slip away without you noticing. But your passions and interests still matter and go a long way to filling your own cup. Whether it’s rediscovering a forgotten hobby or just carving out 15 minutes a day to be alone with your thoughts, reconnecting with yourself is far from selfish: it’s an investment in yourself and, by extension, your family.
Surviving the juggle as a working mother while keeping your mental health in tact doesn’t necessarily mean drastic changes. Rather, it’s about making small, consistent choices throughout your day to make the load more manageable. This Women’s Month, give yourself permission to simplify, to delegate, to breathe and to carry a little less. Not because you’re not strong, but because you deserve to feel as valued and supported as everyone else in your family.
